A Humbling Mother's Day 2013

Mother's Day.  A "made up holiday" as my Daddy would say :) .... but it still has meaning.  
Every year, I have to admit that I subconsciously can feel it getting closer.  Its difficult, to say the least. I didn't go to church this morning... still am not able to go on Mother's Day, too emotionally draining.  

This year I was awakened by text messages starting at 0730.  From family and friends who were just too sweet to think of me today.  It was pretty humbling. I do hope that all my friends who are mothers, had an incredible day today. 

Also had a gift from my best friend Gayden, of my fav... chocolate covered strawberries... and a couple of brooches (James, I know you will love that:) that her daughter helped pick out. Not to mention a handwritten card that made me cry ;)

I am so happy that my own Mother is in New Orleans for the weekend.  Enjoying a getaway with my Daddy and another couple they have been friends with since they were kids.  I was very glad she was doing something she enjoyed.  
I went to Brookhaven to visit my grandparents for a little while, and also my Aunt and Uncle.  Was a good visit, and enjoyed seeing them all.  Macey (my Jack Russell) made the trip with me today.... which was a little therapeutic. 

I went to the church cemetery, which of course was main part of my visit.  The weather was perfect.  I took tulips and just sat outside and soaked in the peacefulness.  It was a very bittersweet day.  I can't even attempt to put into words how much I miss them.  How much I miss the present and future with them... its just too overwhelming to attempt to describe.

I do want to ask for a prayer tomorrow... for a small procedure I have to do at 1:00.  Just prayers for good results would be appreciated.  I know the prayers of God's people can have amazing results... if it is God's will. 

I do hope that all of you had a wonderful Mother's Day doing exactly what you wanted to do, and that you were able to see and hug and love on your children.  Enjoy every second of it... never take one minute of it for granted. 
Thank you all again so much for remembering me as a Mother... I literally feel them with me all the time.

Godspeed, 
Kristi

A working P.O. Box!

Happy to say that my P.O. Box is now in business!  I have no idea why some letters were returned. The only thing I can think of is that they received letters so soon, they didn't realize it was a working box number again?  Who knows... Just glad it's working now. I was starting to doubt myself with posting the wrong address. My mind is spinning most the time, so I wouldn't have been shocked. I'm happy to say it wasn't me :)
I received my first letter today!  Thank you so much Andrea. I promise to put it to good use. I have been sick lately, so haven't been as productive as I had hoped. But I am starting to feel better, and God willing back up to full speed soon. I am also glad to say I have finally thought of a name for my Non Profit. Not going to say in here just yet, but hope to soon. Just as soon as its all set up.
Thank you all so much for your support and help. I can't wait to do more soon.
I'll repost the address just to confirm.

P.O. Box 2788
Madison, MS 39130

Godspeed,
Kristi

Trisomy 18 Awareness Day

3/18.  Trisomy Awareness Day.  
Grayson, you made a mark in this world bigger than I ever will. 
I miss you.

(I received an email saying that a letter was returned from my P.O. Box Address.  I really don't know why, but please try again. I would have emailed you personally... but didn't have your address :)

Possibilities

I am so humbled and excited about the possibilities, stemming from all the comments on Facebook and my blog.  Also by all the people at work who have said something to me, and some who have even already donated.  So many friends, and wonderful people that I don't even know... wanting to help.  I am working now on what the items needed first, and then long term will be.  I wanted to say that I have always received so much support from my family and friends, even when I didn't even know how to accept it.  For that, I thank you.  Everyone of you.  
I still have such a long way to go with my own personal grief and life... but it's such a calling to help, that I can't ignore or put if off anymore. I may not do this all perfectly, but I am going to do it. 
I will be in touch with each of you that have said something to me about helping.  I promise there is enough for everyone :)

I wanted to post my address for any donations:

Kristi Thompson
P.O. Box 2788
Madison, MS 39130

Words can't adequately express how I feel about every one of you who has contacted me.  Thank you..... just thank you.

Godspeed,
Kristi

Trying to live more generously

I really wasn't even sure what I was going to say today when I clicked on "New Post".  To say that its been a long lime since my last entry would be an understatement...  But here I am again. 

I have had something pulling, tugging on me for some time now. I just wasn't at the place where I could make it happen.  To be able to talk to others now, about Kinsey and Grayson... without crying and losing it.  Well, it's taken a long time.  Everything has been a process, for lack of a better term.  

I have finally reached a point where I am trying to be available to others who have been through similar circumstances.  It has taken a very long time.  Anyone that knows or works with me in a casual way, not knowing my history... probably thinks that I don't have any major problems.  I have learned to hide things well.... (most the time).  or "Compartmentalize", the term that  someone who knows me better than anyone would use.
 I have thrown myself into work, and keep myself busy.  

About a month ago... I realized one of the best places for me to start with "giving" was the Fetal Center at the hospital where I work.  The Mother's that go to the Fetal Center are pregnant with babies that have serious fetal diagnosis.... just like I did with Grayson.  There are so many different complex anomalies that they see (Cardiac, Chromosomal etc),  and some of them are diagnosed with Trisomy 18. 
 I never made it, to the NICU or the Nursery with my babies.  And a lot of these mothers won't either.  

I have started small... taking some baby blankets and socks. I also included a Ladybug magnet for the girls, and a Monkey magnet for the boys.  I most recently took some small stuffed animals that my Mom gave me  The nurses there are very appreciative of things to give to the Mothers.  They only have a few stuffed animals to give out.. that they have purchased out of their own pockets.  They are a forgotten group at the hospital. Everyone donates to the Children's Hospital (where I work)... and please don't take this the wrong way.  I LOVE that people donate to our children here.  But these Mothers and babies are a little overlooked.  No one wants to have to really think about the baby and family with the terminal diagnosis...Or the mother who loses her baby in childbirth..... its hard, and its uncomfortable.  I was one of those Mothers.... and I want to help give back to them. 

I know how it feels to have a baby not survive.... VERY unexpectedly (Kinsey).  I also know what it feels like to have a baby with a terminal diagnosis (Grayson).
I cherish the photographs mostly... but I also cherish the blankets and clothes that touched my children.  It's something I have been able to hold onto.  I want others to be able to have something nice to use for their baby... and then hold onto it when they can't hold their baby anymore.  Just like with my children.  
Life is still hard.  My past is still very painful.  I do the best I can every day, and just keep waking up day after day and moving forward. 
 I think that God has been tugging at me for some time... but it's just that I am finally now at the point where I can begin to give.  Finally at the point where I can talk to other mothers. 

Friday, I met a mother with a T18 baby.  She is 8 months old!  I am proud to say that I was able to introduce myself, and talk to her. About my babies, and hers.  I plan on talking to her more.. and I hopefully with meet others in the future.  

One of the main reasons of this post today is to update you a little about me... 
but also to say that if any of you out there would like to help give to these families... I would LOVE the help.  I won't pretend to have a lot of money... but I am going to give what I can.  
If any of you would like to give blankets, outfits, socks, stuffed animals... Anything these families and babies could use... Please contact me.  
I would rather not ask anyone for money... because I don't want anyone to think I am not giving directly to these families.  But if you trust what I am doing enough, then I will buy blankets etc to donate.  
I honestly don't even know who will see this post. No idea if anyone still looks at my blog, or checks in from time to time.  But I posted anyway.  Just for the chance that someone may see it, and want to help. 

Godspeed,
Kristi


Generosity Encouraged   (2 Corinthians 9:6-12)

Remember this:  Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously.  Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver. And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.  As it is written:
"They have freely scattered their gifts to the poor'
their righteousness endures forever."
Now he who supplies seed to the sower and bread for food will also supply and increase your store of seed and will enlarge the harvest of your righteousness. You will be enriched in every way so that  you can be generous on every occasion, and through us your generosity will result in thanksgiving to God. 
This service that you perform is not only supplying the needs of the Lord's people, but is also overflowing in many expressions of thanks to God.