Birthday Wishes

I turned 37 on November 5th...hard to believe. The birthday wish I want, I can not have. I will have it one day though, one day I will be with Kinsey again. I do still have hope for a family here on this earth, I know I already have one in Heaven waiting on me.

Taylor had a surprise planned for my birthday, and the only thing I knew was that it was relatively close to my hometown...because we went there first. We spent 2 days in Brookhaven, and the first place I went after seeing my parents was to the cemetary to see Kinsey's new stone. It was mixed emotions for both of us. It was the first time we had been able to go back since the services. I did alright I guess, but broke down when I got there. Just was so real and so striking to see her name on there.

It was just as we wanted though, it was beautiful. I'm sure she can see it and loves it too. Taylor and I went to the florist and bought some Stargazer Lillies to take with us (those are the flowers I painted in Kinsey's nursery). It was good to just go alone and give her the lillies.

And of course we also brought her some Ladybugs! Live ladybugs...and when we released them, they went everywhere! They were all over her flowers and her stone. It was amazing. Something so simple as ladybugs made me so happy. That in itself was a great birthday present. Taking our daughter her flowers and ladybugs.

I gave her my bracelet, and I put on another....I never take it off.

I know in my heart that she is not there, but its just good to be able to have a place to honor her. I'm also so grateful to my Mom and my Grandma for keeping flowers out there for Kinsey all the time. She has a beautiful view of our church...and of course the softball field where I spent many a summer on the pitchers mound.

On Friday afternoon I finally got to find out what my birthday surprise was... a college football game with my family there! I had a great time with everyone...and even got to see my cousin play in the band at halftime. I can't believe at least one person in my family didn't let it slip, they did good at keeping a secret for a very long time.

He took me to Batesville, Ms....and pulled into a hotel. At that point I knew we were going to an Ole Miss football game, because there isn't anything else to do in Batesville, Ms.

I went to school at Mississippi State...but grew up rooting for Ole Miss due to my Dad and his brother Mark mostly. I'm one of the weird Mississippi people who pulls for all the Mississippi teams...especially living in another state. Its more of a Mississippi thing than anything. Don't hold it against me my Mississippi State friends.....especially Kenny and Sallie Ann! One of my guesses of where Taylor was taking me was Starkville! But I knew shortly after arriving in Batesville why we were going to the Ole Miss vs Auburn game. My parents and my two aunts and uncles were there to surprise me and I had a great time. It was great to see my cousin play the trumpet before the game in The Grove and at Halftime.

I have some great pictures at the game...but I can't seem to find our card reader right now, so I'll just have to post them later. I pray we find that thing...it wasn't cheap!

The first night we were there we ate supper at a hole in the wall place in Como, Ms. Downtown Como....very small. The place was called the Como Steakhouse, and it was excellent! The steaks were Huge, and they grilled them on an open grill right behind our table. If you are ever in Como, Ms...I highly recommend it! We want to go back... The only drawback was that we were all so full after we left that we were pretty much nonfunctional the rest of the night.

The game was an early game at 11:30am...so we got to Oxford at around 9am. Had time to walk around and see Patrick play, then head to the game. The Rebels beat Auburn, it was a great game. Unfortunately the Bulldogs let Kentucky beat them the same day.

It was a great birthday surprise...with family and Taylor, and football. Not bad.

After the football weekend we headed back to Brookhaven and spent a couple of more days. I got to see my family a little more and have dinner at my Grandparents. They are in their 80's and going strong... I'm blessed to still have them in my life. They would have spoiled Kinsey horribly! But she would have already been rotten...

We drove back to Arkansas on Tuesday. I thank God for a safe trip for us all. I got back home to Macey and Brooks...they were wild when we picked them up.

And when I got to the house, I went in the nursery...the lillies were still blooming. I miss you all the time Kinsey.