Monday, July 27, 2009

Dallas, Friends, Food, Gray Man & Kinsey

Taylor and I went to Dallas on Wednesday. We left that morning and made it in only 4 1/2 hours...Taylor was proud of that.

We went to just see friends and try to relax. We lived in Dallas for around 3 years, and still miss alot of things there. Especially the people and the FOOD.

We wanted to just get away, not that we even attempted to "get away" from our thoughts and memories...I never want to get away from those. But it was nice to see good friends and go to our favorite Dallas restaurants. Mainly Cuba Libre and La Hacienda Ranch.

We were able to see a few different friends. There are some that I want to thank...
Kenny, you are always great... we always feel very welcome at your Bed & Breakfast, Macey loved it there too. She said she misses running up and down the stairs. Hope you liked the cheesecake.
Julie, Brian, Lacy, Keith, Lauren etc... it was great to see all of you, and we had a good time playing shuffleboard.
Laurie, thank you for breakfast...and I had a great time just getting to hang out with you for breakfast Saturday morning. I miss seeing you.
Ryan and Emily... we had such a good time Saturday night. The surprise massages were amazing, and definitely a surprise. Playing Rook was really fun, even though the guys won the last round.
Dallas will always hold a special place in our hearts... even though we still hate the traffic.

We did some shopping, and I won't go into detail...but we bought a few gifts while we were there.
We also were able to let some balloons go for Grayson and Kinsey. We had a monkey balloon attached to some other colored balloons. We let them go at Kenny's place. They had the monkey on them from the Barrel of Monkeys...and the same card that was on the balloons we let go at Gray's service. It was a windy day...and they took off! They actually went so far up that we totally lost sight of them. Will we ever hear from any of them? Who knows, but we love letting those balloons go. I will attach some pictures and hopefully a video later.

We came back home yesterday, and its good to be back home. Like I said before, there are things here that I see and still cause me to become upset...but I wouldn't trade it for anything in this world. I will always have those wonderful memories. I would give anything to have Gray and Kinsey back, but I know its not possible. I just have to take it one day at a time...and just keep breathing. With God's help, I hope to survive.
I definitely don't fear death anymore. Don't get me wrong, I'm not ready to leave... but when the time comes, I will get to hold my children again. To meet God, and to see GrayMan and Kinsey.... there will be NOTHING greater than that.

Tomorrow is a big day for us. Tomorrow is Kinsey's 1st Birthday. July 28, 2009. Not the way I wanted it to be, but Taylor and I will do something special for her together. She also has Gray with her now, and I know that they will be together tomorrow and for all eternity. For that I am thankful...and blessed. Thanks be to God.



our family said...

Praying for you all as your remember Kinsey on her birthday! Although I am sure it will be a bittersweet day praying that the sweet memories of her outweigh the pain of missing her and Gray. May God grant you both a special peace on this day and may you feel His love and the love your precious children have for their mom and dad.
Hugs and Prayers
Rachel in PA

Anonymous said...

Praying for you and your family on your daughter's birthday. God grant you the peace in your hearts that you so truly deserve and allow you to grieve in a way that heals your spirits. I hope that my daughter in Heaven who would be 2 next month, has a seat at the party next to Kinsey and Gray tomorrow! Happy Birthday to your sweet baby girl.
-A mom who prays for you

Angela said...

Just wanted to let you know that I am still thinking about and praying for your sweet family.I pray that the Lord will continue to comfort you and carry you so that all you have to do is breathe. Happy Birthday to Kinsey! Although, bitter sweet, I am sure that Kinsey and Grayson are having an amazing celebration!
Hugs & Prayers from Apollo Beach, Fl,
PS I have two babies in heaven that I also hope have a seat at the birthday party tomorrow!

Mindy said...

You guys are amazing parents! Praying ever so hard for you.

Kristi in Colorado said...

I have been thinking about you guys so much. I am praying hard for you and think you are both amazingly strong! Just keep taking things day by day, hour by hour. Happy 1st Birthday to Kinsey tomorrow! I hope you have a good day, filled with all of the great memories you have of her. Thanks for the updates. Also, there was a news story here in Denver, CO about a ton of ladybugs. It made me think of you all and Kinsey. There were thousands and thousands of them. Here is a link to the story:

If that doesn't work, go to 9newsDOTCOM and search ladybugs on July 13th. You have to see the pictures! =)

~Kristi in Colorado

sagreen125 said...

My heart goes out to you guys and pray a lot for you. May God comfort you today.

mrosev14 said...

Happy birthday Kinsey. I know this isn't how you wanted to spend your beautiful girl's first birthday, but she does have her little brother to spend it with her!

I hope you find something that brings you peace to help celebrate her birthday.

Cori Lynn said...

Happy Birthday Kinsey! Your story has touched so many lives, including mine. I am amazed at how strong you and Taylor have been through this past year. Praying for you and Taylor, that God mends your hearts and always remember that Kinsey and Grayman are sitting up there in God's lap watching over mommy and daddy.

with Love from TN.
The Beach Family

Shannon Ryan said...

I'm glad you were able to get away for a few days. I know it doesn't make things 'better' or take the thoughts of your babies away... nothing can ever do that.

Happy 1st Birthday Kinsey.

Anonymous said...

I pray for peace for you and your family. Life is just too unfair at times, it is hard to even grasp that all of this could happen to one family. You are so very strong! Happy Birthday Beautiful Red-Haired Girl!

libby @ ninesandquines said...

Thinking of you today on Kinsey's birthday.....

Heather said...

Happy 1st Birthday, Kinsey. Praying that God is with you both in a special way today.

malibukat said...

Today is my birthday also.
Hapy Birthday sweet Kinsey, we will celebrate our birthdays together one day in heaven!

Cindy said...

Kristi and Taylor:
I can only imagine how special and difficult this day will be! I am praying for all of you and sending you hugs from WV!! May you find time to do something special today to remember your beautiful daughter and her special brother!
Happy Birthday Angel Kinsey! May God continue to wrap his arms around you both and bring you peace during this difficult time!
Lots Hugs and Prayers

Julie said...

Happy birthday Kinsey! I am a friend in Ohio that is praying for your healing. Just keep breathing and crying out to the Lord. My middle child, Cassidy Diane, was stillborn 3 days before her due date. She was 'born' 6/5/98 and has spent many birthdays in heaven. I'm sure she'll be at Kinsey's party as well. God bless you my brother and sister in the Lord. Julie Gibbs in Ohio

randifaypayton said...

Praying for you. New to your blog, my heart aches for your family. You have such courage and strength. We have a monkey obsession in our house, I had to giggle at the whole monkey theme...including the same sock monkey. Following along now, and praying praying. May you find some peace, and be able to grieve as deeply as you need to. God Bless you both!

geegee said...

Sending prayers for you both. I hope you are able to find some comfort in your memories today, and everyday.

hugs and prayers from a stranger in Dallas.

Stacey said...

Happy Birthday Kinsey!

Anonymous said...

I wanted to share a little story with you. I debated, but finally decided that I am pretty sure it would bring you some sort of joy.

I was holding my 7 month old son outside while my husband was working on a construction project in the field (a gazebo). It was hot and buggy. My little guy was wiggling and fussing, and honestly I was getting fed up with him. Then I looked down at him and saw a ladybug had landed in the center of his forehead. I thought of Kinsey. And then of Grayson. My mood immediately changed, I was brought to tears and I was greatful for my wiggling fussy baby.

I cannot imagine think the pain you guys are going through. But if it brings a little bit of comfort (and I am not sure whether it does or not), know that I hold my babies tighter, and love them deeper because of your angels. You will get to hold them again someday. And until then I am sure they are having the time of their lives playing with Jesus.

One last thing. When we lost our baby someone told me this and it brought a little comfort. One day is better with Jesus than 1000 anywhere else. Think of that. Kinsey has already had, what? 365,000 days with Jesus. Thats better than 1000 years and that is the same as how many lifetimes?!

Bless your family today.

Aunt Judy said...

Hey Kristi and Taylor,
I've thought about you all day today--and Kinsey. I just want you to know that I and all my family think about you often, and we will never forget Kinsey and Grayson. They are precious and you truly have a treasure in Heaven. Happy Birthday to Kinsey. We love you.
Aunt Judy

Anonymous said...

Praying for you. May the Lord comfort you!!! May His Grece surround you.

Kinsey and Grayson will be having such an amazing party in Heaven.

from Australia

boltefamily said...

Just wanting you to know I am still thinking of you and praying.

Anonymous said...

My thoughts are with you guys everyday and especially today, on Kinsey's birthday. You know Kristi, looking back, a year and a half ago I envisioned how thanksgiving was going to be at Mrs. Peggy's with two new babies. They both would have turned one this month. Reliving the pain I went through, I know it's nothing to be compared to yours.

Brookeanne said...

You are both so incredible... I wish you all the best.

You are in my prayers!

Tracy L said...

Actually went to a birthday party for a cousin today, and said a little prayer in Kinsey's memory. She's got the best gift... a new little brother to run around with and smile at all the amazing things you'll see when you get there.

Anonymous said...

Happy Birthday my sweet Kinsey Grace. We miss you more everday.We love you and hope to be with you one day.You were our first born grandchild so would have been really spoiled, but we had plently to share with our Grayman.I will always have you pretty flowers, butterflies and ladybugs on your wreaths to show how very much we love you and miss you. Loving you always, MIMI AND PAPAW